Near To You
by The Blondest Brunette
Summary: JxB Bella's marrying Edward in ten minutes, when she realizes something... Is it too late?


I had to. :)

I thought Near To You just fit them so perfectly… It's by A Fine Frenzy and it's just one more thing I don't own.

This is my first time doing a Twilight fic, so I hope I'm not horrible at portraying Bella.

* * *

He and I had something beautiful  
But so dysfunctional, it couldn't last  
I loved him so but I let him go  
'Cause I knew he'd never love me back

You shouldn't be thinking about a guy you love on your wedding day. Well, you should be thinking about _the_ guy you're marrying. Not the guy you left behind.

Alice was grinning and talking a mile a minute as she fixed my makeup and my hair. I couldn't hear a word. I didn't care that I couldn't hear a word. I had come to a horrible realization.

Such pain as this  
Shouldn't have to be experienced  
I'm still reeling from the loss,  
Still a little bit delirious

Edward… He was my dope. He made me wonderfully high, but when he left I was nothing. Jacob had been my hope, or the sun as he put it. Edward had made me broken, suffering withdrawal. Jacob had put me back together; attempt to get over my addiction. I loved Edward, just as an addict loves their addiction. Jacob had taken care of me, helped me, _loved_ me, though he knew I was hooked on Edward. And I had betrayed him, his pack. I had left with the Cullens, the ones they were created to defeat. I had been horribly _cruel_, and I just now realized it.

Near to you, I am healing  
But it's taking so long  
'Cause though he's gone  
And you are wonderful  
It's hard to move on  
Yet, I'm better near to you

"Bella… Bella, can you hear me?" Alice was suddenly looking me in the eyes. Snapping out of my realizations, I looked back at her.

"Sorry. I was just thinking," I answered.

"I don't think it's good to look like _that_ when you're thinking about your wedding day," Alice replied grimly.

"I was just thinking about if and how I should tell Charlie and Renée about me becoming a vampire," I lied.

She looked doubtful, but let it slide. "Well, I hear the music. It's time to go." Alice grinned as I stood up. I half-smiled back. It was too late to go back now. I still couldn't believe my luck. I realized who I really loved about ten minutes before I got married to another guy. Just peachy.

I remembered when we were riding the bikes, and how I lost control simply to hear Edwards voice. I should have just been enjoying my time with Jake, but no, I was too obsessed with Edward. And then the time when we kissed… It was the exact opposite of when I kiss Edward, and I think I might prefer the warmth.

You and I have something different  
And I'm enjoying it cautiously  
I'm battle scarred, I am working oh so hard  
To get back to who I used to be

Before I knew it, Charlie was at my side and we were walking towards Edward. He was breathtaking, as always. I felt horrible. It was one of the many times I was thankful that he couldn't read my mind.

He's disappearing  
Fading suddenly  
I'm so close to being yours  
Won't you stay with me  
Please

I made up my mind at that moment. If Jacob, or anyone, objected to our marriage, I would leave Edward. I would go and find Jacob, my sun, and I would recover. We would be happy. All too soon my father was leaving me at the alter, beside my groom. The priest smiled at us.

Looking over at Edward, he asked, "Edward Cullen, do you take Isabella Swan to be your wedded wife to live together in marriage? Do you promise to love, comfort, honor, and keep her, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health? And forsaking all others, be faithful only to her so long as you both shall live?"

Please, Jacob… Stand up now, I thought to myself.

Near to you, I am healing  
But it's taking so long  
'Cause though he's gone  
And you are wonderful  
It's hard to move on  
Yet, I'm better near to you.

I only know that I am  
Better where you are  
I only know that I am  
Better where you are  
I only know that I belong  
Where you are

Edward smiled at me, his crooked smile. At that moment, all I wanted was Jacob's smile. _My_ smile. I offered a weak smile in return, hoping he would take that as nerves. He did.

"I do."

The priest looked at me, and Edward tensed. Quickly, his eyes darted to the end of the isle, to the man standing at the end. The priest began.

"Isabella Swan, do you take Edward Cullen to be your wedded husband to live together in marriage. Do you promise to love, comfort, honor, and keep him, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health? And forsaking all others, be faithful only to him so long as you both shall live?"

I looked at Jacob. Edward looked at me, then Jacob, and then nodded. I had no idea what had just happened, but suddenly I heard Edward whisper, "go."

I ran.

**The End**


End file.
